Well today was productive. I went to the health food store and grabbed a new liquid supplement to replace my greens superfood powder. It has a mushroom complex in it as well. I also grabbed some acai berry juice, some cashew butter, and some ghee for cooking on occasion. Yeah for goodies. I hope the supplement doesn’t taste like crap but it will be mixed with my smoothies so I won’t be able to taste it anyway i don’t think. this morning I made a fantastic smoothie with banana, cucumber, celery, spinach, blueberries, and fresh frozen mango that i bought and froze myself. For lunch I behaved and had a glucerna shake and a fiber one bar. This was while waiting for therapy. Therapy went well. I fullfilled the promise to myself to work harder and I did. Man should bring his running shoes in sessions with me 🙂 I did not go to the gym but for good reason. Peter was planning on putting together my exercise bike this afternoon and I figured he would need help lugging the 150 pound monstrosity up the stairs. Well by the time I got home he had it up the stairs and part way put together. It is very cool. It is a nordic trak and is very very cool. Anyway, we headed out to dinner when wewere done for some itilain. i behaved and had some seafood pasta in marinara sauce, half of which I brought home. i did have four small deep fried ravioli. I did come to the conclusion though that I really not only need to feel and be aware and be MINDFUL of my body, MINDFUL being the wonderful keyword here, but also really respect what it has to say. I had a small salad and the four small raviolis and I felt full. I could have stopped there but I didn’t. Out of habit I still ate part of my main course. And I really didn’t need to. It would have kept well for tommorow. It was out of habit that I ate and the fact that it looked and smelled great. But for me so much of eating is psychological and not physical. I am not listening to what my body really wants and needs. And I need to do that. After all what is the point of all that MINDFULNESS training if you don’t use it. Oh and as for the oddity section, I find I have the same reaction to caffeine free diet pepsi as I do to regular diet pepsi. it gives me instant anxiety. So I totally need to stay away from it. Not that I am big into caffeine anyway. Stimulants and I don’t get along well. But crazy or not, there must be an additive or flavoring or colorant or something in the caffeine free stuff that is just as bad for me as the regular. So yet another reason to stay away from soda. The only caffeine I really allow into my diet is the occasional unsweetened iced tea I have with a glass of water when I go out to eat and thats it. Nothing else. And yes I do know that tea is high in caffeine but it doesn’t effect me like coffee or soda. Could be another reason to call me crazy :-0 But than again, most of you don’t need another reason LOLOLOL. It’s a good kind of crazy most of the time. Anyway, tommorow I am headed to the cardiologist and then am definitely headed to the gym for a swim. I need to get back into the pool desperately. I need to feel my muscles move in the water and feel my body glide and float. So I am going directly from the doctor, no excuses (though I did do 15 minutes on my new exercise bike tonight too ) Anyway that’s me signing off.